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Hayley-XXI-10

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Revision as of Nov 12, 2019, 2:44:06 PM
created by LisaGee
Revision as of Feb 3, 2020, 10:17:47 PM
edited by LisaGee
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My dear Eliza,  
 
My dear Eliza,  
  
Your letter has indeed struck me with a <u>double surprise</u>. of the first I shall not speak at present, because I feel perhaps a little too like the honest old servant, you mention, to relish it <u>on the sudden</u>
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Your silence afflicted me, because it led me to apprehend you were ill; for which I sincerely grieve.—your letter also afflicts me, because it expresses a disposition not to regard my advice & my Intreaties, on a Subject, where I had used such Arguments, & such Supplications, as I flattered myself must have influenced both your Mind & your Heart. alas! my dear Eliza, you talk of <u>Resentments</u>, but what Occasion for Resentment, or Hostility, can we have against each other?— Destiny brought us strangely together:— We wished to make each other happy:—Nature rendered it impossible:— We are neither of us to blame:— but each of us, I trust, in the sight of God, no common degree of Merit, in having most generously, tho unsuccessfully long laboured to do, what could not be done.— You speak of 22 years of domestic vexation:- My Sufferings in that Period were not inferior to yours; & had I not, with a singular Mixture of Resolution & Tenderness, removed you from me, I must have sunk into Ideotism, or into the Grave.— But tho the peculiar Texture of our respective Nerves rendered us, involuntarily, & imevitably, a Source of Misery to each other, when under the same roof; we may surely prove very tender Friends to each other at a distance; & it sha;; not be my Fault, if we cease to be so.
  
As to your projected Travels to the south, I am, in Truth, surprised & allow me to say <u>a little hurt</u>, that you could in <u>any degree settle</u> such a Project, which, you must know, would agitate my Feelings, in no common Manner, without first <u>consulting me</u> on a point, so important to each of us. I shall speak on this subject with that perfect <u>Sincerity</u>, <u>Tenderness</u> & <u>Resolution</u>, which have ever prevailed in my language & conduct towards you, & I may say, towards every Creature, with whom I have had any kind of Intercourse – When you have heard what I have to communicate on this Topic, I am persuaded, your own Goodness & Generosity of Heart will induce you to postpone your promised visit to the old Countess to <u>another year</u>; & to chuse for your sea-bathing <u>this Autumn</u> some coast much nearer to you than Felpham.  
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Yet Man, you know, is imperious by Nature; & my Spirit perhaps is particularly so, because I am conscious, not of superior Powers, but of that upright Benevolence, which never would impose any Command on Another, that I would not myself obey in the same Situation:— Had y<u>ou prayed me</u> not to visit derbyshire, with s<u>uch arguments</u> as I gave you against your Visit to Sussex, I protest to Heaven, I would have endured any Pain or Sickness, rather than have acted in opposition to your Intreaties. – You tell me, you can find in the North no bathing place so convenient as Hastings;
 
 
It would be <u>utterly impossible</u> for me to be in Sussex, when you visit it, without having my spirits so agitated with inexpressible, & I must own painfully affectionate Inquietude about you, that I should be perfectly disabled from all profitable Study – nor could I
 

Revision as of Feb 3, 2020, 10:17:47 PM

My dear Eliza,

Your silence afflicted me, because it led me to apprehend you were ill; for which I sincerely grieve.—your letter also afflicts me, because it expresses a disposition not to regard my advice & my Intreaties, on a Subject, where I had used such Arguments, & such Supplications, as I flattered myself must have influenced both your Mind & your Heart. alas! my dear Eliza, you talk of Resentments, but what Occasion for Resentment, or Hostility, can we have against each other?— Destiny brought us strangely together:— We wished to make each other happy:—Nature rendered it impossible:— We are neither of us to blame:— but each of us, I trust, in the sight of God, no common degree of Merit, in having most generously, tho unsuccessfully long laboured to do, what could not be done.— You speak of 22 years of domestic vexation:- My Sufferings in that Period were not inferior to yours; & had I not, with a singular Mixture of Resolution & Tenderness, removed you from me, I must have sunk into Ideotism, or into the Grave.— But tho the peculiar Texture of our respective Nerves rendered us, involuntarily, & imevitably, a Source of Misery to each other, when under the same roof; we may surely prove very tender Friends to each other at a distance; & it sha;; not be my Fault, if we cease to be so.

Yet Man, you know, is imperious by Nature; & my Spirit perhaps is particularly so, because I am conscious, not of superior Powers, but of that upright Benevolence, which never would impose any Command on Another, that I would not myself obey in the same Situation:— Had you prayed me not to visit derbyshire, with such arguments as I gave you against your Visit to Sussex, I protest to Heaven, I would have endured any Pain or Sickness, rather than have acted in opposition to your Intreaties. – You tell me, you can find in the North no bathing place so convenient as Hastings;