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Hayley-XXI-10

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created by LisaGee
Revision as of Feb 3, 2020, 10:29:55 PM
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possibly, fix on any Plan of conduct towards you, that would entirely tranquillize my Mind. This I should not so much regard, were it not for very particular circumstances.
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But I entreat you to recollect, that Scarborough is much nearer to you than Hastings.— On looking into the Map I find a good road from Derby to Lincoln, which you may travel in postchaises; & from Lincoln I apprehend you will readily find most commodious Coaches to Scarborough;- a Scene highly beautiful in itself, & particularly convenient for bathing!
  
I have still so much of my <u>original Heroic Spir</u>it, that I would not <u>shrink from an Inquietude or Pain</u>, by which I could contribute to <u>your Health</u> or <u>Comfort</u>, if such Inquietude & Pain would not necessarily produce <u>Consequences</u> that <u>You</u>, (I am sure) of all persons living, would most wish to <u>prevent</u> – I mean those of injuring materially my un<u>settled Health</u>, & involving me in <u>various distresses</u>.
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If you approve this plan, that I most tenderly recommend to you, I will most willingly take on myself all that Expence of your Chaises, backwards & forwards, between Derby & Lincoln; by which Measure, I apprehend, this project must prove considerably cheaper to you than an Expedition to Hastings. Your coming into Sussex this year must unavoidably prove a source of Inquietude and distress to my Mind; & if you persist in that Resolution, I shall consider it as an open Act of Hostility & defiance.
  
To explain this, I must enter a little into my literary History, woeful as it is – It will not surprise you to hear, that I have made repeated attempts to reinforce my petty Exchequer with <u>dramatic supplies</u>¸& with my <u>antient success</u> – This long series of disappointments has involved me in <u>some debt</u> & still <u>more anxiety of spirits</u>, both which I hope, in some degree, to remedy by devoting the next year to as much calm & retired study in this my favourite Retreat, as my Brains will bear; & the more so, as I have promised to execute, by the beginning of the Winter, a new Life of Milton, for a splendid Edition of the divine Bard, which is to appear as a Companion to the Boydelian Shakespeare.-
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Yet even than, my dear Eliza, I shall harbour no <u>Resentm</u>ent ag<u>ainst you</u> – I shall never act as your Ennemy, [sic], for, in Truth, I cannot intentionally be so; but you will force me, much against my Will, to cease corresponding with you as a Friend, & I shall bitterly lament, that you have not that Esteem & regard for me, which my Heart & Conscience assure me I have deserved from you; & which, (if you had them) would assuredly induce you not to persist in a Measure, that I tell you (in the most tender Manner) you cannot pursue, without wounding my peace of Mind to such a degree, as to render me unfit for all profitable Study. — ah! my dear Elizaq! why should you tear from us both the only Enjoyment, that our Singular destiny can allow us to derive from each other?–I mean the constant Intercourse
 
 
Now I confess to you very frankly, that I could not execute a page of this work, were you to pass the Time you mention, or even arrive, summer in sussex; I will only say on this subject in the words of your acquaintance the old Lion, "<u>Sensation is Sensation</u>”
 

Revision as of Feb 3, 2020, 10:29:55 PM

But I entreat you to recollect, that Scarborough is much nearer to you than Hastings.— On looking into the Map I find a good road from Derby to Lincoln, which you may travel in postchaises; & from Lincoln I apprehend you will readily find most commodious Coaches to Scarborough;- a Scene highly beautiful in itself, & particularly convenient for bathing!

If you approve this plan, that I most tenderly recommend to you, I will most willingly take on myself all that Expence of your Chaises, backwards & forwards, between Derby & Lincoln; by which Measure, I apprehend, this project must prove considerably cheaper to you than an Expedition to Hastings. Your coming into Sussex this year must unavoidably prove a source of Inquietude and distress to my Mind; & if you persist in that Resolution, I shall consider it as an open Act of Hostility & defiance.

Yet even than, my dear Eliza, I shall harbour no Resentment against you – I shall never act as your Ennemy, [sic], for, in Truth, I cannot intentionally be so; but you will force me, much against my Will, to cease corresponding with you as a Friend, & I shall bitterly lament, that you have not that Esteem & regard for me, which my Heart & Conscience assure me I have deserved from you; & which, (if you had them) would assuredly induce you not to persist in a Measure, that I tell you (in the most tender Manner) you cannot pursue, without wounding my peace of Mind to such a degree, as to render me unfit for all profitable Study. — ah! my dear Elizaq! why should you tear from us both the only Enjoyment, that our Singular destiny can allow us to derive from each other?–I mean the constant Intercourse